[Ulysses is] the work of a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.
How to read ‘Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone’? Why, very quickly, to begin with, and perhaps also to make an end. Why read it? Presumably, if you cannot be persuaded to read anything better, Rowling will have to do.
An idiot child screaming in a hospital.
Miss Austen’s novels . . . seem to me vulgar in tone, sterile in artistic invention, imprisoned in the wretched conventions of English society, without genius, wit, or knowledge of the world.
He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.
Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?
I don’t think Robert Browning was very good in bed. His wife probably didn’t care for him very much. He snored and had fantasies about twelve-year-old girls.
Every time I read ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone.
That's not writing, it's typing.
Burn, Jack Kerouac.
obvs the harold bloom one is a piece...shit because he’s a piece of shit who was...
somewhat accurate (omg Hemingway...love Kerouac but it’s true) except Harold Bloom